I know I mentioned awhile back that I was going to be changing up the format on here and posting more regularly. I guess I lied. Well, not intentionally, I just am finding that plan does not in fact lead to success.
I shouldn't post on a night like this. I just feel really. Dead.
I always feel like Sisyphus. No one ever knows who the hell that is so then I feel even more alone in the world. Lonely, isolated, living in a vacuum. I know it gets old doesn't it?
I am tired of putting my heart into things and never having them take off. I am tired of hearing that one must step out of their comfort zone to find what ever it is they are seeking. Honestly, at this point, my comfort zone is a pretty wide place, what am I supposed to be a drug king pin or something?
I can't buy in to a lot of things lately. God. The American Dream. My own dreams. This town recovering. The idea that things will get better. The notion that the love you take is equal to the love you make. Diet Dr. Pepper tasting as good as regular Dr. Pepper.
It gets to you after awhile.
When I woke up this morning, I was ready for a great day. I don't know what happened. Well, not entirely. I was very bummed to have a message from the super secret group that the cafe was going to be closed indefinitely. Par for the course tho in this town something awesomely cool comes along that me and the mister enjoy and someone comes along and fucks it all up.
I know I am boring everyone with my malaise. Sorry.
I don't know how I am supposed to get from here to there. There being this ever evolving plan to have a couple of well-thought out regularly posted blogs. This blog would go closer to its roots as a kindness in giving sort a thing with one day being for some specific spiritual type subjects I have been itching to write about, one day for basically giving shout-outs to people I know who have wares they are peddling 'cuz every little link helps (right?) and the third day would be more like this used to be where I posted specific opportunities for giving but unlike before I am not going to try to be middle of the road, I'm gonna post what I like and who I think people should support 'cuz it's my blog. GetCleverNow.com is going to start being less and less about the clever container products and more and more about getting one's shit together in general. I'll still offer the products but they won't be the focus. I actually have one other partially defunct blog that I was going to resurrect and post three days a week with more of a family theme...actually, specifically, I was going to have Mommy Mondays, Wifey Wednesdays, and I forget what Friday was but it was cool.
I may just use the GetCleverNow.com to cover all of that. It would certainly be less posting. IDK, not very good at turning ideas into action anymore. Plus, there is that whole disappointing aspect of no readership. I had a blog for nearly three years I think, and as far as I know I had one regular reader. Some guy in St.Louis who just happened to find it flipping thru blogs.
Anyway...now would be a good time to go to sleep.